This one actually comes up a lot, and it's hard to answer in any way other than slapping your forehead and saying "duh". It might not be the most eloquent response, but it would get the point across.
We're not your friend. We're not a spouse stuck in this abusive relationship with you. We're a business who want to continue being a business. Stop acting so hurt that we're not letting you shout at us because we find you witty.
Is there anything else we can help you with today, beloved person who I don't know?
Is there anything else we can help you with today, beloved person who I don't know?
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